I adore my son. He is the joy of my life.
On non-T-days (MWF) our little friend Baby Leah comes and plays with us. Since she was born last Christmas she and H have been hanging out like siblings. They spend a LOT of time together, they share clothes sometimes (in emergencies or for humor), they play with each other's toys, and sleep at each other's houses.
Recently, however, H has developed a new attitude. A hateful, jealous attitude. Baby Leah may not touch his toys. Baby Leah may not touch her toys. If Baby Leah is on Mama's lap, so must he be. Folks, my lap is shrinking by the day! He's crabby and mean and snatchy and screamy. I mean, he's still fun and sweet and cute and gleeful, but this jealousy kind of freaks me out. I know it's a stage. It's always a stage, good or bad. My fear is that Baby Brover is coming along soon, and he'll be able to defend himself less than Baby Leah can. AND he'll need a lot more of my attention than Baby Leah does. This could get ugly.
On the other hand, H now quacks when he sees a picture of a duck. It's the funniest thing ever. We tried to capture it on video this morning unsuccessfully. It's not your typical Quack, Quack.
In other news
I really dig our farmer's market. I love that my boy and I can get all sorts of free samples of fruit to stuff in our faces, and that the prices and freshness are so insanely superior to the grocery store.
Also, I really have a teeny crush on Obama, and McCain scares me. That being said, I want you to read Meesh's husband's summary of Obama's acceptance speech at the DNC last week. It's a treasure.
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7 comments:
Sorry that you are going through a few "rough" stages all in a row. Just feel the love from the jealousy (I haven't had that so I have no great things that have worked for me).
Obama scares me, I don't know why but maybe I think he has a hidden agenda...I don't really know.
Our little guy has had some jealousy issues, but (miraculously) learned how fun it can be to play all by himself a few months before Grace was born. Somewhere between 2 and 2 1/2. So, in a year plus... Still, he was jealous. Sometimes still is. People forget, but I think two kids is hard. But don't worry too much--the newer the baby, the more rubbery and cartlidge-y Baby is. And soon H will forget he was ever alone and be concerned when baby isn't in the room with him. And he'll share toys when you want Baby to sleep and share cheerios and juice and sippy cups of milk ("It is milk.") with Newborn. H will have so much fun!!! and he'll be so cute with Baby.
Jessamine was born when Max was 26 months old, and it was really bad timing for him developmentally. He's actually never had a problem with jealousy, but it caused major delays with potty training and speech and such. It's like he just stopped and waited for her to catch up before continuing.
Maybe it's a good thing yours is being jealous now, maybe he'll get it out of his system. I will say though, having Jessamine made me really miss the boy. There were so many time I wanted to just snuggle with him for a bit and couldn't. Still makes me sad to think about that time, seeing him smile at me and reach out for a hug and not be able to reach back.
I think jealousy in some form is inevitable with new big brothers (or sisters). I think my best tool for combating jealousy was my baby sling. Once the newborn is in there, it's like he doesn't exist to the older sibling (and the baby is usually out of my mind too.)
I also learned with my second, that sometimes it's okay to let the newborn sit and fuss while I spent time with my older child. I felt a little guilty not being able to give #2 as much undivided attention as I did #1, but the second child really will never know the difference.
I also think toddler jealousy is mostly just confused emotions--don't you agree? And while it is annoying, it's not as nasty as adult jealousy.
I have no advice for you. I'm just sorry that it's happening. I like that he quacks like a duck--can't wait for you to get that on video! And that summary of Obama's speech was priceless!
Thanks for the plug for our blog! Isn't my husband funny? You don't have to agree, but I know the truth. I just wonder how our little boys will turn out (if we end up having any boys)...characters, to be sure.
I noticed with my niece Lorelei that she was a lot more clingy when my sis was closer to having a baby this year....
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